How to be confident:
1. Filter your thoughts
All of us tend to overthink. It's normal but it is also important for us to control our negative thoughts. Everyone will break down at some point but remember to always tell yourself “time to get back up because you are the only one that can take charge”. Baby steps though. Let's all start the day looking in the mirror and saying “Today will be a good day, I am strong and I can conquer this day”. It’s a new day so let's keep our heads up and smile brightly. Even a smile can already improve your entire mood. Starting the day with self love & appreciation is crucial. When u start feeling down anytime throughout the day, tell yourself “Hell no. You are who you allow yourself to be and I am confident. I'm not going to allow anything or anyone ruin that or tell me otherwise’. The more you practice these, you will slowly realize that you have become more positive, eventually feeling happier and more cheerful.
2. Self reflection
Don’t you think many people are advocating self-care right now? Self reflection is a form of self-care because we take time to listen to ourselves and take care of our mental, emotional and physical health. Therefore, take some time off once in a while, maybe once every few weeks to sit down and ask yourself “how am I feeling? Why am I feeling a certain emotion? If it's bad, why is that so? Is it because I haven't been having enough time to myself? If it's good, what is it that is going well? Can I continue feeling this way? “
You can even write down your feelings in a journal / book. Personally, I have been using the app called “journey” which has been super helpful for me. Better still, it’s password protected. After a few months time, you can even read it back and be proud of the journey you have gone through. You will realize that you're so much stronger than the credit you give yourself. It really does boost your confidence knowing you've made it so far.
3. Value yourself / validate yourself
This is such a simple point. It may sound so easy yet it can be one of the hardest practices. Not gonna lie, it is very common for us to find validation from things and people around us, even if we never noticed it. Clearly, it is normal to ask for someone else’s opinion, however, it shouldn’t be overdone. One of the most effective practices is before seeking external validation, i would ask myself, “What do I hope that person tells me?” Then I would tell myself that first. It might seem a little weird in the beginning but it’s okay, it takes practice and don’t ever judge yourself. Love yourself a little more !
4. Dress up
It may seem unimportant to many people to dress up even if it’s just staying at home. Many of us think that it’s only “normal” to dress up during special occasions or a proper day out. Little did we know that dressing up affects our behavior, attitude, mood and confidence. To me, dressing up means being comfortable with what you wear while feeling good and confident with yourself. Maybe wearing a shirt and shorts makes you feel good and that's perfectly fine. It all goes down to individuals on what kind of clothing or style best fits. This is why I encourage all of you to not be afraid or try out new things. You never know, maybe a little yellow t-shirt brings you more joy than an old grey t-shirt.
5. Put yourself first
‘You do you’ is a phrase I live by. You live to please yourself, not others. Don't ever feel pressured to be something you're not. For example, it’s okay to turn a friend down if you’re really not feeling it or busy. You don’t have to say yes to everything. Try learning to say no sometimes. You will realize how much more relieved you will feel. Don’t worry you're not being selfish honey. Instead, you're standing your ground and showing that you dictate your own life, no1 else. Trust me, this person is gonna have a newfound respect for you.
Always remember, being confident and positive is not an overnight task. 1 thing I realized is - when someone is confident, they be glowing and it will definitely show and draw people to them. Personally, being confident is one of the most important and treasured qualities I have because it never fails to get me through tough times and overcome some of my insecurities and fears.
With that, remember to always always be confident and smile. Being happy makes you look younger so lets confuse people with our actual age ;)